1. Ask your children to remember what they did at school, other times they were away from you, or when you went on a special outing. If children cannot think of anything to say, ask more specific questions.
2. Listen to what your children tell you. Ask follow-up questions, including how they felt about what happened. Avoid correcting your children about their impressions.
3. These conversations can happen anytime there are moments to spare – for example, at a bus stop or in a waiting room.
4. Elaborative reminiscing can support children’s developing language and literacy skills (e.g., narrative skills, vocabulary understanding, phonological awareness) and socioemotional development (e.g., less anxiety and withdrawal, increased helping behaviors, better understanding and control of negative emotions, improved autobiographical memory).

“What did you do in school today?”: Elaborative reminiscing can yield answers

Most parents, when picking up their child from school, have asked, “What did you do in school today?” and heard their child respond, “Nothing.” What happens next depends on many factors, but mostly it depends on the parent.

Some parents think their child just does not want to talk about their day and change the subject. Other parents challenge their child (e.g., by saying something like, “No, that was not what happened…”), which is usually no more successful at eliciting descriptions of the child’s experiences than changing the subject. Success would be getting a child’s own extended description of what happened during some experience.

Photo: Tatiana Syrikova. Pexels.

My colleague Carole Peterson (Memorial University of Newfoundland, Canada) and I wanted to understand better what strategies parents use that can effectively get children to share something about their day.

We conducted a study in Newfoundland (Canada), with middle-class, European American families with two- to two-and-a-half-year-old children.  We found that the most successful parent strategy for eliciting information was asking specific follow-up questions, such as, “What did you play at recess?” or “What stories did the teacher read to you?”

Children of parents who asked a lot of questions about one particular topic became the best narrators over a year later, telling lengthier stories that included more key elements, such as background information and details about how situations got resolved.

We call such parents topic extenders. Other researchers have found similar results and dubbed this kind of extensive conversing between parents and children elaborative reminiscing or joint reminiscing.

Elaboratively reminiscing benefits children’s language and socio-emotional development 

Peterson and I, along with Beulah Jesso (Memorial University of Newfoundland, Canada), then engaged in an experiment in which we randomly assigned parents of children (average age 3 years and 7 months old) in families with low incomes to one of two conditions.

In the first, we talked to parents about elaborative reminiscing and how important it could be to their children’s language acquisition; the second was a business-as-usual control group.

Collaborative, elaborative reminiscing with children of various ages benefits the children linguistically, cognitively, emotionally, and academically.

After a year, despite not specifically mentioning vocabulary to parents, children in the experimental (elaborative reminiscing) group had significantly better receptive vocabulary (the ability to understand words) than those in the control group.

After another year, they also had significantly better narrative skills. We learned that storytellers are made, not born.

Elaborative reminiscing benefits additional areas of language and socio-emotional development

Elaborative reminiscing benefits children in a variety of ways. Research has shown that, in addition to improvements in children’s vocabulary and narrative structure, elaborative reminiscing increases children’s phonological awareness, which is critical for learning to read. Reading interactively with children does not have the same effect.

In addition to promoting language benefits, elaborative reminiscing affects children’s socioemotional development in many ways, reducing children’s tendencies to act out or have internalizing problems (e.g., sadness, anxiety, withdrawal), and increasing their prosocial skills (e.g., being kind and helpful to others).

Such reminiscing helps children understand their negative emotions and regulate them. Children’s memory of their own lives (autobiographical memory) is also more coherent.

Teaching parents how to elaboratively reminisce

Many different families have benefitted from learning of the importance of elaborative reminiscing. Children who live in poverty benefit; after all, elaborative reminiscing costs nothing, requires no particular accomplishment or comfort with reading books on the part of their parents, and is fun.

Photo: Ketut Subiyanto. Pexels.

Parents from New Zealand families of diverse backgrounds have benefited from this kind of instruction. In addition, my colleague Ashleigh Hillier (University of Massachusetts Lowell) and I have taught parents of teenagers on the autism spectrum to engage in elaborative reminiscing, something that the parents had not considered important but that extended parents’ talk about the past with their teenaged children.

Moreover, this type of reminiscing may even benefit children who have been maltreated by their mothers. When these mothers learn to elaboratively reminisce with their children, their children may eventually have better physiological regulation.

Cultural qualities of reminiscing

Despite the fact that observing and learning about elaborative reminiscing has been successful in a number of different cultures, parent-child talk about the past has documented some cultural differences.

Many Asian cultures do not value extensive talk about an individual’s past experiences. In particular, many Japanese parents consider such lengthy talk unsuitable. Cultural differences in reminiscing conversations have also been found in Western European cultures, such as Germany, Sweden, and Estonia.

How to elaboratively reminisce with children

Parents should understand that collaborative, elaborative reminiscing with their children at various ages benefits the children linguistically, cognitively, emotionally, and academically. In this work, parents are encouraged to accept their children’s view of what happened, even if the parents have different ideas.

The more you reminisce with your child, the better they will get at doing so and the more you will foster their well-being in many areas of development.

I have collected examples of children’s talk about going to Disney World and Disneyland. When parents asked children to tell their grandparents their favorite part of the adventure, they expected children to say “meeting Goofy” or “going on the It’s a Small World ride.”

Instead, children said their favorite things were experiences like the “blue lights on the floor of the plane,” “a real dead armadillo on the side of the road,” and “two sinks in our bathroom.” Parents who accept their children’s point of view learn a lot about their children’s thoughts and values and foster their development.

The best times to reminisce with children include when you are eating dinner together or waiting for doctors or buses or driving somewhere together. Children especially enjoy being asked about what to them are notable events.

For example, you might ask: Did anybody do something weird in preschool today? Did you get hurt? Do you remember what happened the last time we went to the doctor’s office?

Tell them about experiences you have had (e.g., the time you got in trouble with a teacher). The more you reminisce with your child, the better they will get at doing so and the more you will foster their well-being in many areas of development.

The post Storytellers are made, not born: The benefits of elaboratively reminiscing with your child appeared first on Child and Family Blog.

Key takeaways for caregivers

• Co-sleeping, typically defined as infants sharing a room or a bed with parents, is common worldwide but varies in acceptability across cultures. It is practiced less in U.S. culture and parents vary widely in how they view it.
• Pediatric organizations (e.g., the American Academy of Pediatrics ) do not endorse bedsharing, and although the AAP does not appear averse to roomsharing per se, research in Western cultures has linked persistent co-sleeping (i.e.., bedsharing, roomsharing, or a combination of both) beyond six months to parent and infant issues.
• Our research found a link between co-sleeping and more sleep disturbances among parents, especially mothers, which may occur in any culture where co-sleeping occurs.
• Co-sleeping was also associated with greater co-parenting distress and poorer quality of bedtime parenting, which may be more likely in cultures where co-sleeping is less accepted.
• Infants’ sleep did not appear to be affected by co-sleeping.
• Decisions about co-sleeping with one’s infant are ultimately personal choices. If practiced, co-sleeping should be done safely, following AAP guidelines, and co-sleeping parents should take steps to nurture their relationship as a couple.

Article contents:

1. Questions about parent-infant sleep arrangements are complex
2. Do infant sleep arrangements relate to infant and parent sleep quality or parenting behaviors?
3. Parent-infant co-sleeping was linked to poorer maternal sleep and parenting issues
4. Effects of parent-infant co-sleeping are likely to be culturally specific
5. Promoting co-parenting and safe and healthy sleep may be most critical

1. Questions about parent-infant sleep arrangements are complex

How parents should structure their infants’ sleep and whether infants should sleep by themselves (in a separate room) or co-sleep with their parent(s) (i.e., in the same room or the same bed as the parent(s)) is a controversial, sensitive, and personal topic. At the heart of the matter are arguments about what is best for babies and beliefs about that vary widely.

These beliefs are informed by cultural prescriptions, recommendations from medical professionals who argue against bedsharing for safety reasons, evolutionary biologists who argue for bedsharing because it protects infants, individual parental beliefs, availability of sleep spaces and other practical considerations (e.g., convenience), and infants’ age.

Adding to the confusion and controversy, in Western cultures, infant sleep arrangements are fluid during the first year, with parents more likely to co-sleep soon after birth than later. This makes it more challenging to identify whether a family co-sleeps.

Photo: Sarah Chai. Pexels.

Choices about where infants should sleep and for how long may not be just about what is best for the baby, but also about what is best for the family.

Some studies suggest that parents who co-sleep with their infants may be at risk for marital and co-parenting distress. Parents, particularly mothers, who co-sleep with their infants also awaken more at night and have more sleep problems than do parents and infants who sleep in separate rooms.

2. Do infant sleep arrangements relate to infant and parent sleep quality or parenting behaviors?

Choices about infant sleep arrangements can be confusing and may be influenced by competing needs and demands. To better understand how parenting and infant and parent sleep affect family life, in our recent study, we examined sleep arrangement patterns across infants’ first six months of life.

We assessed 124 U.S. families when infants were one, three, and six months old. Most mothers and fathers were White (8%), married or living with a partner (95%), and in their 30s; 57% of the infants were girls.

Ninety-nine percent of parents had completed high school and about two-thirds had a bachelor’s degree or higher. Most fathers (89%) and mothers (61%) mothers worked full or part time when their babies were one month old; median yearly family income was $65,000.

To measure participants’ nighttime sleep, we used activity monitors (actigraphs) that parents wore on their wrists and put on infants’ calves at bedtime for seven consecutive days.

We also measured mothers’ emotional availability with their infants (e.g., warmth, sensitivity) during infants’ bedtimes (from video recordings made by parents).

Mothers also completed questionnaires to assess the quality of positive co-parenting (e.g., support and endorsement of one’s partner) and negative co-parenting (e.g., amount of conflict with and undermining by one’s partner). Infant sleep arrangements were determined from the video recordings of the infants at night.

It is parents’ sleep, and particularly mothers’ sleep, that may be affected most by co-sleeping.

3. Parent-infant co-sleeping was linked to poorer maternal sleep and parenting issues

From the video recordings when babies were three and six months old, we identified three patterns of sleep arrangement:

• Solitary sleeping (infants slept in a room separate from their parents at both ages),
• Co-sleeping (infants slept in the same room or the same bed as their parents at both ages)
• Co-sleeping to solitary sleeping (infants roomed with or shared a bed with a parent at three months and were moved to a room of their own by six months).

Babies who slept in the same room as their parents rarely spent all their time on a sleeping surface separate from their parents, even with a crib in the room. Videos showed that mothers frequently brought their babies to the parents’ bed in response to infants’ distress, with infants falling asleep in the parents’ bed without being immediately returned to the crib.

Consistent with other research, co-sleeping families were more likely than the other two groups to have lower socioeconomic status, be non-White and unemployed, and have fewer years of education.

We also saw patterns relating to duration of breastfeeding and parents’ symptoms of depression and anxiety. We used statistical techniques to consider those patterns and explore specific relations between co-sleeping and both sleep quality and co-parenting, finding that:

1. Mothers had poorer sleep quality if they co-slept. Fathers who co-slept with their infants experienced more varied sleep quality across the week than fathers whose infants slept alone.
2. Infants’ sleep quality was not related to sleeping arrangement at all.
3. Mothers reported less positive and more negative co-parenting, and were observed to be less emotionally available to their infants at bedtime.

Our results are consistent with other work showing that compared to non-co-sleeping, persistent co-sleeping is linked to poorer parental sleep, particularly mothers’ sleep, and with more co-parenting distress and less emotionally available parenting.

Photo: RDNE Stock project. Pexels.

Our finding that infants’ sleep was unrelated to sleep arrangement indicates that it is parents’ sleep, particularly mothers’ sleep, that may be affected most by co-sleeping. This does not bode well for long-term maternal well-being: Chronic sleep problems can increase individuals’ risk for depression, which can affect relationships with other family members.

4. Effects of parent-infant co-sleeping are likely to be culturally specific

Our study was done in the United States, a culture that, by and large, does not support persistent co-sleeping. Parents who engage in persistent co-sleeping in a culture that does not support it may be criticized for engaging in a practice some consider harmful to babies – despite that fact that our study did not find any negative associations between co-sleeping and infant sleep.

Such criticism is based solely on the tendency of members of a culture to accept a cultural prescription as “the right thing to do” without supporting evidence. Researchers should replicate our study in a culture in which co-sleeping is more accepted to determine whether findings are similar or different.

When co-sleeping is culturally embraced, parents who co-sleep are less likely to be criticized by family members and friends.

We suspect that the link that we found between co-sleeping and heightened sleep disturbances among parents, especially mothers, would be culturally ubiquitous, but the links among co-sleeping, co-parenting distress, and reduced maternal emotional availability with infants at bedtime would not.

This is because sleeping near one’s infant is likely to affect parents’ sleep, regardless of the cultural backdrop. In contrast, the association of co-sleeping with heightened family stress should be less likely when co-sleeping is culturally accepted.

For example, when co-sleeping is culturally embraced, parents who co-sleep are less likely to be criticized by family members and friends.

Photo: Kevin Liang. Unsplash.

5. Promoting co-parenting and safe and healthy sleep may be most critical

Do these findings lead us to recommend that parents not co-sleep with their infants?

Assuming parents follow medical recommendations for safe sleep (e.g., the AAP guidelines; i.e., avoiding bedsharing, eliminating loose bedding and clothing, and placing infants in a supine position on the sleeping surface), we do not make such a broad recommendation.

Although our study’s co-sleeping parents as a group appeared to be at higher risk for family distress than were parents who slept without their babies, even when they said they preferred to co-sleep, some parents who co-sleep did not experience heightened co-parenting distress, nor were they less emotionally available to their infants at bedtime than parents of infants who slept alone.

It appeared that these parents were on board with their choice of sleep arrangement. The parents’ relationship with each other was not compromised, which suggests that they took time to nurture their relationship as a couple (e.g., not just in terms of co-parenting but by making time for themselves and each other) and that co-sleeping with their infants did not interfere.

Thus, to the extent that parents are aware that co-sleeping can interfere with their sleep and their relationship as a couple, and take steps to promote each other’s sleep and their relationship with each other, the choice to co-sleep may not be at all problematic. We did not conduct interviews or collect information about this idea and believe it would be an important question to explore.

The post Infant-parent co-sleeping: What do sleep arrangements mean for families? appeared first on Child and Family Blog.

Key takeaways for caregivers

• Babies’ intake of new information that is emotionally relevant might vary depending on when they last slept.
• After being awake for an extended period, babies become attuned to negative emotional information.
• Supporting babies in their sleep requirements, such as by maintaining consistent bedtime rituals, can support their well-being.

Sleep helps babies grow and develop

Have you ever planned to take your baby to playgroup but decided not to because it was nearly naptime? Many parents assume that their baby’s readiness to engage with others is connected to how wide awake or sleepy they are. But does all their learning happen only when they are wide awake?

Babies were actually better at recognizing angry and sad faces after they had been awake for a longer time.

Babies spend most of their time sleeping. Rather than being a waste of time, sleep helps their growing bodies and brains: Sleep plays an important role in babies’ physical growth and cognitive development, including their learning and memory.

Babies who nap soon after learning new information remember more of the newly acquired information and can use it more effectively to solve new problems than can infants who do not nap soon after learning.

Compared to these insights into the benefits of sleep when it occurs after learning, we know little about the relevance of infant sleep that occurs prior to a learning opportunity.

In everyday life, parents might observe their baby getting cranky when naptime or bedtime approaches. However, researchers have not extensively studied whether babies process information differently depending on whether they have recently slept.

Does sleep enhance babies’ learning of emotional information?

Surprisingly little research has been conducted on whether infants’ learning of emotional information is affected by their sleep patterns. To start addressing this gap in knowledge, we asked: What are the effects of sleep timing on six-month-olds’ recognition of emotional faces?

Photo: Tim Dennell. Creative Commons.

We focused on recognizing emotional faces because faces are frequently encountered and are important visual stimuli for babies. Babies learn about faces quickly.

From birth, babies prefer to look at faces over other visual patterns. They quickly begin to recognize the face of their caregiver, and prefer to look at faces more like the ones in their environment (e.g., preferring faces of people of their race over faces of people of other races).

Beyond the value of recognizing familiar faces, faces are also important because they display social and emotional cues that mirror a person’s mood. Keeping in mind who looked friendly and who looked angry might be particularly important for babies, who depend on the care of others for their survival and comfort.

Studying infant sleep and recognition of emotional faces

We were interested in discovering how easily babies recognized human faces showing different emotional expressions based on whether the babies had recently slept or been awake for an extended period.

Because research has shown that sleep benefits babies’ learning and memory, we predicted that babies would find it easier to keep emotional faces in mind when they were well rested than to do so when they were sleepy.

We visited 17 six-month-olds and their caregivers in their homes over two days. One day, we visited after the babies had awakened from a recent and long nap. The other day, we visited toward the end of the babies’ longest period of wakefulness (which averaged 140 minutes).

The babies in our study may have been better at recognizing sad and angry faces when they were sleepy because the negative information matched their own current emotional state.

On both occasions, we had each baby sit on their caregiver’s lap and tested infants’ visual memory through a procedure commonly used in research.

Babies were shown pictures of female adult faces displaying neutral, sad, or angry expressions.

We filmed babies’ looking times to each face using a hidden camera, arranging the presentation in the same way each time: First, babies saw a picture of a person (for example, looking angry). Next, they saw the same picture next to a picture of a new person with the same emotional expression as the first one.

When babies are shown a picture for a longer time, they grow tired of it (just as adults do) and pay less attention. When they see a new picture alongside the old picture, they pay more attention to the new one, but only if they remember the old one. If they do not remember the old picture, they might look at both the old and the new pictures for the same amount of time.

Photo: Hessam Nabavi. Unsplash.

Babies had better memory for angry and sad faces after being awake

Using this logic, we found some surprising results. In contrast to our predictions that recent napping would strengthen memory, babies were actually better at recognizing angry and sad faces after they had been awake for a longer time.

They failed to recognize these kinds of faces when they had recently slept. In other words, it appeared that the babies were particularly receptive to emotionally negative information after they had been awake for a long time.

How might babies see their social world at different stages in their sleep-wake patterns?

The babies in our study may have been better at recognizing sad and angry faces when they were sleepy because the negative information matched their own current emotional state.

As babies get tired, they can become grumpy which, in turn, might lead them to process information that matches this state. Researchers call this mood-congruent learning. While we did not test this explanation in our study, it should be an avenue for further research.

Photo: Jerald Jackson. Creative Commons.

Although our study was small, the results suggest one mechanism that might link early sleep problems and later impairments in mental well-being. Assuming that sleep problems regularly lead to fatigue and delayed sleep onset, affected babies might be susceptible to taking in emotionally negative information efficiently and storing it in their memory.

As a consequence, the developing knowledge base of infants with sleep problems versus infants without sleep problems could be quite different, leading to different, perhaps more pessimistic, views on the (social) world.

These speculative ideas clearly require more research. Our results suggest that timing of sleep could influence which type of information babies focus on and process.

What does this mean for parents?

Due to the small size of our study, our findings about processing emotional information must be considered preliminary. However, it is clear from previous research that sleep plays an important role in early development.

Having a calm and consistent bedtime routine helps babies make the most of their learning and the fun interactions they have had during the day. Learning to read babies’ early signs of tiredness, and adjust to changing sleep schedules as they grow, can help babies enjoy the benefits of good sleep.

The post Tired and cranky: Babies who have been awake for a while are more sensitive to sad and angry faces appeared first on Child and Family Blog.

• Experimental evidence shows that playing simple number-focused board games with preschool-aged children can improve their mathematical skills.
• Playing number games and encouraging young children to think about numbers in everyday conversations can help children practice counting principles and notice number-related aspects of their environment.
• Following children’s lead and encouraging mathematical thought in their interests may help them become more interested in math in the long term.

Incorporating math in everyday play at home

“Five, six, seven, eight,” counts four-year-old Remy as he moves his token three spaces, counting on from five, where he ended his last turn.
“Now I’m winning!” he says.
“How do you know that?” asks his dad.
“I’m on eight and you’re on six and eight is bigger than six!” answers Remy.

This vignette of a father and his son highlights the unique opportunities for preschool-aged children to learn from simple activities in the home, such as playing board games. Opportunities for engaging with mathematical information at home are referred to as the home math environment.

Previous meta-analytic research (which provides an average of effects from more than 60 studies) has established that the home math environment relates to children’s performance on math skills tests.

Young children tend to do better at math when they do things at home like identify and write numbers; play games with cards, dice, and spinners; and sort objects by shape, size, or color.

However, these correlational findings alone do not tell us much and leave unanswered two important questions:

1. Does increased engagement with mathematical and numerical information at home cause children to become better at math?
2. Do children who are better at math seek out more play opportunities that involve math than other preschool-aged children?

Photo: Karolina Grabowska. Pexels.

In addition, it is well-documented that mathematical skills are at least somewhat intergenerational in nature: Children of parents who are good at math tend to be better at math themselves.

To learn more, we asked whether playing games that involve counting improves children’s mathematical skills and whether improving parents’ math skills indirectly leads to improvements in children’s math skills.

How can we improve children’s math skills?

My colleagues and I conducted a study with 162 four-year-olds, each of whom was with one of their parents. The research took place in a large urban area in western Pennsylvania, and families were randomly assigned to one of five conditions. Parents were instructed to play an assigned game at home (either with their child or by themselves, depending on the condition) twice weekly for eight weeks:

1. Number board game (parents and children): Players used a spinner with numbers 1-6 and moved the number of spaces the spinner pointed to on their turn. Participants were told to count each space aloud as they moved their piece.
2. Shape board game (parents and children): Players used a spinner with different shapes (e.g., square, circle, triangle) and moved to the next space marked with that shape on their turn. Participants were told to name the shape on each space aloud as they moved their piece.
3. Computerized math game (parents only): This game was designed to improve parents’ math skills involving approximate mental addition or subtraction. Parents were shown sets of dots on the screen, then asked to say how many dots were there; the sets changed too quickly to count.
4. Computerized trivia game (parents only): Parents were asked to respond to multiple-choice questions involving general trivia.
5. “Business-as-usual” control group: Families were not given new materials and were asked to proceed with life as usual.

The conditions were devised to help us answer the following questions:

• Does playing a number game improve math skills more than playing an identical board game that does not involve numbers?
• Does a game that challenges parents’ math skills improve their children’s math skills more than a game that tests parents’ knowledge of general trivia?
• Do preschool-aged children learn more when they are directly involved in playing number games with their parents than they do when their parents play alone?
• Do preschool-aged children’s math skills improve more through these game-based interventions than they do without intervention?

Preschool children’s math improved the most from playing a number game with their parent

Children in the number board game condition outperformed children in the other conditions on a standardized math assessment after two months of engaging with their assigned condition.

In other words, children’s math skills improved the most when parents played a number game (versus a non-number game) with them (versus without the children).

Parent-child interactions that directly incorporate number, such as playing number board games together, can lead to improvements in children’s math skills.

Moreover, this improvement resulted from the intervention, not simply because of natural everyday learning (the business-as-usual condition).

While differences faded two months beyond the end of the intervention (as seen in a delayed post-test after materials had been taken away), there was still an indication of a positive effect, and continuing the intervention or testing a larger group might have found lasting effects.

Supporting parents’ math does not necessarily improve their preschool child’s skills

Parents in the computerized parent math game condition improved their own math skills and this improvement was present in the delayed post-test two months later.

However, in the delayed post-test, their children’s math skills were worse than their peers in the control condition. This appeared to have been due to changes in the home math environment: Parents in the math game condition reported doing fewer math activities with their children over the study than did parents assigned to play number board games with their children.

This finding is somewhat intuitive: Parents have a limited amount of time, so asking them to spend some of that time playing a game alone takes away from time they could be playing with their children.

While parents’ math skills seem to relate to preschool-aged children’s math skills, more research is needed to better understand why: Maybe parents who are better at math engage in more play with their children around math concepts, or maybe they express less hesitancy (or math anxiety) in those interactions. What is clear is that improving parent’s math skills does not necessarily affect children’s math skills.

Number games promote learning about numbers and counting

Overall, our findings show that playing number board games with children can lead to improvements in children’s math skills. But why?

Children benefit from repeated practice of saying the numbers in the count list in order, making more/less comparisons, and matching each number with a discrete object (e.g., a space on a board).

In addition, numerous studies have found that children who notice number-related characteristics of their surroundings (as opposed to other characteristics, such as color or shape) tend to perform better on tests of mathematical skills.

Photo: Keira Burton. Pexels.

Returning to the example of Remy and his dad, this short interaction gave Remy a chance to practice a lot of the principles necessary for learning to count.

He had the opportunity to practice reciting the count list in order and to see that each space represents one and only one count in the count list (one-to-one correspondence) in a potentially new context with objects he had not counted before (abstraction).

Through a simple prompt, Remy also had opportunities to make a more/less comparison and to discuss the stable order of the count list. That is, he recognized that eight is and will always be more than six, and that regardless of starting point (here, starting from five), the count list progresses in the same way (stable order; order irrelevance).

In playing the number board game, Remy (and the participants in our study) may have been encouraged to see the numerical features of their surroundings.

In everyday life, while one child might see a scene in the clouds, another might notice that there are exactly four clouds; similarly, one child might see apples ready to be picked from a tree, while another might see a proportion of red to green apples.

This is also true for adults: One individual may notice herself automatically operating mathematically even when it is not necessary (e.g., in looking at a clock at 6:18, she notices a 1:3 ratio), while another adult may perform a quick approximation (e.g., note that it is about 6:20) or see a general association with the time (e.g., “It’s getting late — we should have dinner soon!”).

Parents can incorporate math into everyday activities

Whether in board games, card games, or everyday routines, parents and caregivers can help preschool-aged children better understand principles of counting. Adults can encourage children to focus on numerical features by using simple conversational cues, such as:

• “How many are there?”
• “Are there more (X) or more (Y)?”
• “Who has more?”
• “Which is (bigger/smaller)?”

These kinds of prompts can be used in all sorts of contexts, including:

• Reading books: counting objects on a page, making comparisons to past pages or inferences about pages to come, discussing relative sizes
• Public transit: counting down the number of stops remaining, noticing the route number, discussing the number of passengers and how that changes as people board and disembark
• Cooking: measuring ingredients, counting additions or stirs, tracking time
• Grocery shopping: buying on a budget, tracking items, choosing a checkout line based on the number of items allowed and the shoppers in line

Making math learning fun and engaging for preschool-aged children

Children who have fun engaging with math information and games may find themselves drawn to those topics and activities in the future. As such, it may be unsurprising that children in our study who were randomly assigned to play a mathematically focused game outperformed their peers who did not play the game on a math test.

Children who have fun engaging with math information and games may find themselves drawn to those topics and activities in the future.

However, using a numerical board game this way does not have to represent an isolated context.

While parents and caregivers can help shape preschool-aged children’s interests by incorporating enjoyable media in a content area, children can also choose activities based on their own interests.

These interests can be a starting point for further learning, and encouraging and following them may produce a trusting, fruitful, and engaging relationship. In turn, that relationship can support the development of curiosity and inquiry. Such an approach also provides an opportunity to capitalize on children’s interests to build excitement about mathematical learning.

Conclusions: Support children’s math learning during play and daily routines

Extending beyond the well-documented correlational evidence that the home math environment relates to children’s math skills, we now have experimental proof that playing numerical board games can improve preschool-age children’s math skills.

Just as importantly, we know that parents have limited time and, when it comes to trying to improve children’s math skills, that time is better spent on talking about numbers while playing with their children than on working alone on their own math skills.

These activities can also happen in routine parent-child interactions. Parents can engage children’s interests in all sorts of settings, including on transit, while cooking and shopping, and when reading a book.

With simple questions and prompts, parents can highlight number in many non-math activities. Incorporating these small changes so children see number in all they do can have a meaningful effect on math skills.

The post Playing number games with preschool-aged children can improve their math skills appeared first on Child and Family Blog.

• Parent-based applications (apps) are an emerging trend for helping parents and caregivers create stimulating early home learning environments for their young children.
• New evidence shows that a digital app-based intervention can boost parents’ self-efficacy for supporting their child’s development in the first 1,000 days.
• Researchers need to build the evidence base on the impact of parent-based apps.

This article will explore baby parenting apps and their effectiveness through the six following elements:

1. The importance of a baby’s first 1,000 days
2. Supporting the early home learning environment
3. The growing presence and popularity of parent-based apps
4. Evaluating a new parent-based app
5. Using the parent-based app increased parental self-efficacy
6. Parent-based apps may be a promising avenue for education

1. The importance of a baby’s first 1,000 days

The first 1,000 days of a child’s life, from conception to age two, are an important period for child development. For example, although the human brain continues to develop and change throughout life, the first 1,000 days are a period of rapid brain development. However, during this time large differences across a range of child outcomes begin to emerge between children from lower socioeconomic backgrounds and their peers from more affluent backgrounds. One reason for these differences is that disadvantaged children are less likely to experience high-quality early home learning environments.

Photo: PNW Production. George Pak, Pexels.

2. Supporting the early home learning environment

High-quality early home learning environments typically consist of early play and learning opportunities, including parents and caregivers engaging with their young children through play and verbal responsiveness. Research shows that in-person interventions that help parents and caregivers understand how to create stimulating and supportive early home learning environments can significantly benefit parenting knowledge and practice.

Digital interventions can have significant benefits for parents and caregivers in their child’s first 1,000 days.

These interventions can also support strong parent-child interactions, such as increasing parents’ sensitivity and responsiveness to their child’s interests and needs when playing and communicating with them. Interventions have also been shown to improve child development outcomes.

New digital technologies, in the form of parent-based applications (apps) used on smartphones or tablets, have recently emerged as a way to increase access to these supportive services for parents.

3. The growing presence and popularity of parent-based apps

Parent-based apps are primarily designed to be used by parents or caregivers. They are intended to encourage offline interactions and learning opportunities with children. The number of parent-based apps available to download has grown significantly, from three apps released in 2010 to between 42-46 new apps per year between 2018 and 2020.

This is also a rapidly growing sector with venture capital investments currently worth nearly $1.4 billion.

However, very little research has evaluated the impact of these new digital technologies during children’s first 1,000 days. This research is needed to help parents and other stakeholders make informed decisions about whether this kind of support is suitable for their needs.

Photo: PNW Production. Pexels.

4. Evaluating a new parent-based app

To address this gap, I evaluated a new parent-based app in a pilot randomized control trial with parents of children from birth to six months old in the United Kingdom. (The opportunity for this study arose from a previous collaboration with the app developer).

The app includes 1,026 daily age-appropriate activities for parents to choose from across eight areas of child development, such as language, socioemotional, sensory, and physical/ motor skills. Each of the activities explains to parents what to do and how to do it, using low-cost resources easily accessible in most homes.

In our study, we sought to understand whether the app could help boost parents’ self-efficacy during their child’s infancy. Parental self-efficacy encompasses parents’ beliefs or judgments about their ability to be successful in their role as caregiver. It helps guide their interactions with their young child and plays an important role in the parent-child relationship, as well as in child development outcomes and parents’ mental health. We focused on parents of children aged 0-6 months because of the emerging evidence on parental self-efficacy in the earliest months, as well as the availability of parental self-efficacy measures in this age range.

What research has shown

Research has shown that parent interventions aimed at increasing parents’ skills and knowledge also boost parents’ self-efficacy. In our study, we asked whether digital delivery of parent education, through the parent-based app activities, would also positively affect parent self-efficacy.

Parent-based apps could offer an accessible and affordable solution for boosting parents’ self-efficacy and improving the early home learning environment.

Randomized Control Trial Design

Seventy-nine parents of children from birth to six months took part in the study. On average, parents were 33 years old and children were three-and-a-half months. Parents were recruited from a convenience sample, and mostly consisted of White British mothers with a university-level education.

Half of the parents were randomly assigned to the treatment group and were asked to use the app with their child every day for four weeks. The other half were assigned to the active control group and were sent weekly e-mails that contained three activity ideas. The activities were selected from the ideas in the app, but the e-mails provided only brief descriptions of what to do for each activity. No additional details were provided, and activities were not tailored to the age or stage of development of the child as they were in the app.

5. Using the parent-based app increased parental self-efficacy

Ninety percent of parents in the treatment group reported feeling “confident” or “very confident” on all the standardized questions about parental self-efficacy. This group’s self-efficacy ratings were also significantly higher than those of the active control group. Moreover, in the treatment group, those who used the parent-based app more times per week over the four-week period also reported greater self-efficacy.

6. Parent-based apps may be a promising avenue for accessible parent education

This new evidence establishes proof of concept that digital interventions can have significant benefits for parents and caregivers in their child’s first 1,000 days. Given the widespread use of mobile phone technology by adults around the world, these parent-based apps could offer an accessible solution for boosting parents’ self-efficacy and improving the early home learning environment.

Photo: RDNE Stock project. Pexels.

Researchers need to continue to build the evidence base for the effectiveness of parent-based apps. For example, studies can help establish the impact of these innovations on child development outcomes as well as with parents from different backgrounds.

Our results are limited to the specific parent-based app we evaluated. Additional research is needed to evaluate the quality and impact of other parent-based apps and to identify which specific content or features are most beneficial. Researchers should also examine how parent-based apps can be disseminated most effectively, such as through partnerships with early childhood education and care providers.

It is important to ask questions about the effectiveness of parent-based apps, including under what circumstances they are most suitable and for whom they work best.

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• Although most parents strive to provide a loving, gentle and supportive environment for their children, they sometimes rely on harsh parenting practices to instill discipline and rules.
• Our research shows that harsh parenting, such as hitting or shouting, may have a damaging effect on children’s behavior and emotional development. Not to mention their educational attainment.
• This is a two-way relationship: Children struggling with big emotions or having trouble behaving appropriately (as any child will during their development) may also increase the strain on their caregivers’ parenting behaviors.
• This can lead to a self-perpetuating loop in which harsh parenting practices increase children’s mental health problems, which leads to further increases in harsh parenting practices, thus further exacerbating children’s mental health difficulties.
• Policies and services for parents should emphasize the benefits of positive parenting practices over harsh parenting practices.

Harsh parenting negatively affects children’s mental health

In many parts of the world, including the United States, England, and Northern Ireland, physically punishing children is still officially permitted. This is problematic considering that several studies suggest that harsh parenting practices, such as hitting or shouting, negatively affect children’s behavioral and emotional development.

Such practices have been linked to an increased risk of mental health issues, including anxiety, depression, and aggression. They have also been associated with poorer academic performance, lower self-esteem, and impaired social skills.

Using harsh parenting practices such as hitting or shouting is not only ineffective as a disciplinary tool but may harm children’s mental health.

How does children’s mental health affect parenting behavior?

While research has primarily considered the effect of parenting behavior on children’s development, effects may also occur in the opposite direction. Children who act out frequently or struggle with controlling their emotions may also place unique strains on parenting behavior. As a result, children’s mental health may negatively affect parenting.

For example, a child who has trouble controlling their emotions may throw frequent temper tantrums, which can lead to parental frustration and negative reactions, such as yelling or physical punishment. This, in turn, may lead the child to struggle with controlling their emotions even more.

Such two-way relationships have received limited attention in research. By recognizing the influence that a child’s behavior can have on parenting, interventions can be designed to target both the child’s emotional and behavioral difficulties and the parent’s reactions and coping mechanisms. Supporting parents in managing their child’s difficulties in a positive and effective way can ultimately lead to better outcomes for both the child and the family.

Photo: Monstera. Pexels.

Exploring two-way relations between parenting and children’s mental health

My colleagues and I conducted a study to explore the two-way relations between parenting behaviors and children’s mental health. We investigated whether harsh parenting tactics such as hitting and shouting show two-way relations with children’s behaviors across early to middle childhood (when children are three, five, and seven years old).

The behavioral effects we studied included two externalizing behaviors – conduct problems (e.g., throwing temper tantrums) and hyperactive/inattentive behaviors (e.g., being easily distracted). We also looked at emotional problems (e.g., symptoms of depression and anxiety).

Our study included 14,037 children (49% female, 84% White) and one of their parents (primarily mothers) who were part of the UK Millennium Cohort Study. Participants came from a variety of socioeconomic backgrounds, ensuring that the study was representative of the UK population.

Evidence for two-way relations between harsh parenting and children’s mental health

Using harsh parenting techniques, such as shouting at or hitting three- to five-year-olds, led to children showing more symptoms of hyperactivity and inattention, and more emotional problems when they were five and seven. These findings are consistent with previous research showing that harsh parenting practices have a negative effect on children’s mental health.

Harsh parenting practices can increase children’s mental health problems which, in turn, lead to further increases in harsh parenting practices.

This is not a one-way relation. Parents of children who showed more conduct problems and hyperactive/inattentive behaviors and parents of children with higher levels of emotional problems were more likely to increase their harsh parenting in the subsequent year. Thus, harsh parenting may have negative effects for children through a negative self-perpetuating loop: In this way, harsh parenting practices can increase children’s mental health problems which, in turn, lead to further increases in harsh parenting practices.

Photo: Luke Pennystand. Unsplash

How can parents support children with behavioral or emotional issues?

1. Support children’s ability to meet expectations

First, our findings suggest that using harsh parenting practices such as hitting or shouting is not only ineffective as a disciplinary tool but may harm children’s mental health. Other parenting techniques should be used to support children’s healthy development, such as ignoring unwanted behaviors, setting clear expectations, and explaining why certain behaviors are unwanted. (For additional examples, see the evidence-based Incredible Years Parent Programs.)

These approaches help children understand and learn from their mistakes without damaging their self-esteem or sense of security. Using such methods can lead to a more positive and supportive relationship between parent and child.

2. Consider socioemotional difficulties

Second, our findings underline the importance of addressing parenting difficulties in families with socioemotional difficulties to help prevent the accumulation of additional issues. Children experiencing big emotions or having trouble behaving appropriately can increase the stress and challenges of parenting. Thus, we encourage parents to reflect on their parenting strategies and seek the assistance of mental health professionals to develop ways to support their children in overcoming challenging behaviors without resorting to harsh parenting tactics.

Photo: Ahmed akacha. Pexels.

What does this mean for child development policy?

Our research supports recent policy changes in Scotland and Wales, which explicitly ban the use of physical punishment as a parenting tool. We encourage policymakers in other parts of the United Kingdom, the United States, and elsewhere to implement similar policies.

Policymakers should also prioritize providing interventions and services for at-risk children and families. This could include evidence-based parenting programs, mental health support for parents and children, and other forms of family support to help promote positive child development and prevent the escalation of behavioral and emotional difficulties and negative effects.

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• Friendships play a critical role in children’s social and emotional development.
• Children with autistic traits have difficulty with socioemotional skills, putting them at risk for peer rejection.
• Autistic children who are also aggressive or disruptive are particularly vulnerable.
• Parents and teachers can support children with autism through early interventions targeting socioemotional skills and lessons about peer acceptance for all children.

Friendship and acceptance by other children are vital ingredients for thriving young lives and are at the heart of growing up. They help children get out of bed in the morning, and encourage them to look forward to attending school, playing and learning, and building relationships. In contrast, loneliness, isolation, feeling awkward, and being bullied make everything more problematic. How do we ensure that the lives of children with autistic traits are not harmed by rejection?

Children with autism typically experience challenges developing, maintaining, and understanding relationships. They want friendships but struggle to make them. Mostly, they have difficulties adjusting their behavior to suit various social contexts.

Children with autistic traits who also have behavioral problems need the most support with their peer relationships.

They may not be able to communicate in ways that lead to friendship or understand how to share imaginative play in the same ways as typical children do. How does this impede acceptance and fruitful relationships at school? What can be done to improve this aspect of life for children with autism?

My colleagues and I have been studying five- and six-year-olds in primary schools in the Netherlands (called elementary schools elsewhere). The children had varying levels of autistic traits, often at such low levels that it was not clinically diagnosed. We know that young children with autistic traits are more likely to experience rejection and non-acceptance, even when the traits are at a low level.

The impact can be considerable. Studies show that having a friend at school can protect a child from an unwanted situation or behavior. A friend can act as a source of emotional support, providing a safe space to express thoughts, experiences, and opinions.

Photo: Wallpaper Flare.

Being without a friend at school can lead to feelings of loneliness and isolation, which can, in turn, make children vulnerable to bullying and negative behaviors. These experiences can have lasting effects on overall well-being, leading to low self-esteem and poor academic performance.

Risk of aggressive behavior

Our study identified a particularly vulnerable group of young children with autistic traits: those who are also aggressive and disruptive. Children with autistic traits who also have behavioral problems need the most support with their peer relationships. Other children tend to isolate them or make them targets of bullying.

Schools can address these matters through programs designed to improve peer relationships in inclusive classrooms. Some programs focus on reducing children’s behavior problems (e.g., aggressive acts, poor temper control, sadness, anxiety, fidgeting, impulsive acts), especially when the problems are above and beyond the autistic traits that most convincingly predicted poor relationships in our study.

In many cases, children with autistic traits can and do have friendships and experience acceptance.

Successful friendships

Our study also considered children with lower levels of autistic traits (whose autism may not have been diagnosed) and with non-aggressive behaviors. As noted earlier, their condition was associated with less peer acceptance and more rejection. It may be hard for these children to carry out basic social skills such as starting and maintaining conversations, taking turns, and responding appropriately to social cues. They may find it difficult to understand others’ minds, and to decode others’ intentions, emotions, and thoughts, leaving them confused, so it is important to help these children navigate social situations more effectively.

In many cases, children with autistic traits can and do have friendships and experience acceptance. Other children seem to find ways to engage with them. In some cases, particularly in inclusive environments, a peer understands that a child has autism. A teacher might explain the condition and the peer develops a friendship with the child, accepting that it will be a different kind of friendship that is less reciprocal than their friendships with neurotypical children.

Photo: Leeloo Thefirst. Pexels.

How to support young children

Our findings suggest many opportunities for improving the relationships of children with autistic traits. The first step is recognizing and accepting the trait, not denying it. Parents should be alert: A child who initially responded to their name might suddenly, around 18 months, cease to respond. That can be a red flag.

Much can be done to help a child with autistic traits interpret a world that can seem confusing. With children as young as three, flashcards attached to everyday activities – waking up, having breakfast, taking a nap – can help build a vital vocabulary.

Likewise, photos of parents or caregivers highlighting labelled emotions – such as happy, sad, tired – can help train a child to better recognize facial expressions, improving the reciprocity and responsiveness of their interactions. Parents can role play what happens when other people visit, going through the language of meeting and greeting. It helps to start early.

The message from our research is that friendship and acceptance matter a great deal to each child’s development, both socially and academically. Adults can help children enjoy friendships by spotting traits of autism early and intervening in appropriate ways. Such interventions should address aggression, which is most harmful to children’s chances of having successful relationships.

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• Parents, peers, and schools all represent crucial influences that shape how white¹ adolescents make sense of racism and their actions toward social justice.
• Having explicit conversations with white youth about racism and embedding children in racially diverse environments that acknowledge race are essential to countering the dominant color-blind narrative that race “doesn’t matter.”
• Conversations about race with white youth must go beyond simply acknowledging historical and contemporary racism toward encouraging anti-racist attitudes and actions to address inequities.

Children receive messages about race and color-blindness from multiple sources

There is no “neutral” in racism. All youth learn to either reinforce or disrupt systems of inequality that uphold and maintain a racist status quo. As such, shielding white children from learning about race and the United States’ racist history encourages a way of knowing that is untethered to the country’s racial realities and further sustains white supremacy and racism.

Contrary to the color-blind narrative that positions racism as a thing of the past and “everyone as equal,” racism is embedded in structural forces (e.g., law, institutions, housing) and continues to shape all people’s experiences (though differently). The color-blind narrative is pervasive among white parents and caregivers and within predominantly white institutions (including school settings). For instance, only 53% of white parents believe schools should teach about the ongoing effects of slavery and racism in the United States, while 82% of Black parents hold this belief.

For white youth, social environments that counter the color-blind narrative and instead address racism may be integral to fostering social justice action.

Regardless of whether children receive explicit messaging about race, they interpret the various experiences, interactions, and (un)intentional messages in their lives. Parents, peers, and schools are three interrelated influences that shape how children make sense of race during adolescence. For white youth, social environments that counter the color-blind narrative and instead address racism may be integral to fostering social justice action.

What social contexts about race and racism do white adolescents in the United States experience?

In our research study, we examined the myriad influences that shape how white youth make sense of racism and the resulting impacts on their social justice behaviors. We used survey data from the Maryland Adolescent Development in Context Study to examine 323 white adolescents’ racial environments (i.e., the social contexts that may shape their beliefs and attitudes about race and racism), with particular attention to conversations with parents about race and racial attitudes, cross-race friendships, and conversations with peers about race.

We also looked at the diversity of youth’s schools with respect to racial composition and curriculum. We then explored how these different racial environments during adolescence (16-17 years old) related to white youth’s social justice actions two years later in young adulthood. All participants in the study lived in a racially and socioeconomically diverse county in the Eastern United States.

Photo: cottonbro studio. Pexels.

The racial environments of most adolescents (80%) were characterized by silence or passivity about race. Such environments align with a color-blind narrative in which racism is downplayed or ignored, limiting white adolescents’ ability to disrupt and challenge racism. However, the racial environments of some adolescents (20%) were more race conscious, meaning that race-related conversations occurred more frequently, schools were racially diverse and acknowledged race and racism in the curriculum, and adolescents had cross-race friendships.

How did different racial environments affect white adolescents’ social justice action?

White adolescents in race-conscious environments were engaged in more social justice behaviors during young adulthood than were white adolescents in racial environments characterized by silence. These behaviors included participating in civil rights or women’s rights groups. Our findings suggest that when white youth are in environments that are racially diverse and that acknowledge race and racism, they are more likely to take action in young adulthood to promote and foster social justice.

How can parents foster social justice attitudes and behaviors in their white children?

The findings of our study, in conjunction with other recent findings, challenge the often-espoused color-blind belief that not talking about race promotes equity. Instead, they suggest that having explicit conversations about racism and inequality, and embedding children in environments (e.g., schools) that are racially diverse or conscious of racism, can foster white adolescents’ reflection and actions toward creating and maintaining equitable social conditions for all people.

How can parents and caregivers foster a race-conscious environment for white youth?

First, parents and caregivers of white children should reflect about their own racial attitudes and beliefs. As we saw in our study, even parents who believed they had “positive” racial attitudes may foster a color-blind racial environment for their children.

Parents and caregivers must talk early and often with their white children about racism.

Thus, parents should challenge themselves to think critically about race in the United States and how their own racial identity relates to the ongoing perpetuation or disruption of racism. Numerous resources are available to prompt such critical reflection, including engaging with the works (e.g., film, books, art) of authors and artists of color that portray the racial realities of the United States.

Second, after such reflection, parents and caregivers must talk early and often with their white children about racism. For instance, when children bring up or notice race, parents should discuss what their child is noticing rather than silence them or communicate that noticing race is bad.

Building white adolescents’ skills

Discussing race and racism, celebrating and recognizing the contributions of people of color (which are often excluded from mainstream narratives), addressing racialized police killings and violence, and reflecting on the history and current manifestations of white supremacy are integral to building white adolescents’ skills for anti-racism work and for actively communicating the racial realities of the United States. (See EmbraceRace raising young white allies for more resources.)

Finally, the results of our study highlight the multidimensional nature of children’s racial environments. In other words, it is not just parents who play a role in how children make sense of racism, but rather a multitude of influences, including but not limited to peers and school. As such, fostering white youth’s social justice behaviors means embedding children in racially diverse environments in which cross-race friendships can form and where school curricula acknowledge and affirm people of color.

Photo: Ron Lach. Pexels.

White parents and caregivers can also promote change in their children’s schools by standing with parents of color as allies and teaching their children to stand up against racism. Parents can also support candidates in local and national elections who recognize the importance of discussing racism in educational settings. (Read more information on the debate about critical race theory in schools here.)

In conclusion – racial justice requires reckoning with whiteness and countering narratives

The take-home message is that reaching a state of racial justice requires reckoning with whiteness and countering the pervasive color-blind narratives that produce false and inaccurate understandings of racism in the United States. In particular, our study demonstrates how race-conscious environments can counter the racist status quo by building white youth’s efforts for social justice. Our findings also underscore the role of white parents and caregivers in ensuring that the next generation strives for an equitable and anti-racist society.

¹ Although the style of the Child & Family Blog is to capitalize ‘White,’ the authors have intentionally not capitalized the word when it refers to skin color. For information supporting this rule, please see The Associated Press.

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• Building healthy relationships with technology involves not only protecting youth, but also supporting their positive experiences online.
• Helping middle schoolers navigate the digital world involves strategies similar to those used for their in-person activities: monitoring, spending time on the internet together when possible, educating them about risks, and communicating.
• Ongoing communication is critical. Talk about your values and expectations, ask what young users are doing online, and listen to how they feel about those experiences.
• Parents cannot do it alone. Digital technology companies and policymakers need to ensure that the online spaces where young people spend their time support healthy development while also keeping them safe.

Protecting and supporting youth on the internet are both important

Parents often ask what they can do to protect their children online. This is a good question. But another important question that should be asked is how can we better support our youth on the internet?

As mothers to tweens and teens, we are always looking for ways to protect our children from harm. One of us is also a developmental psychologist who has studied adolescents’ mental health for more than two decades, learning that we need to both protect and support our children – particularly around the middle school years as they make the transition to adolescence and into online spaces.

This is why we recently released a report on what research tells us about amplifying the benefits of digital technology for this age group and calling on technology companies and policymakers to adopt an evidence-based approach to protecting and supporting youth. But even as we urge technology creators to do better, there are steps parents and other caregivers can take to both protect and support positive digital technology use for young people.

Promoting healthy development and well-being with positive online experiences

Early adolescence (from about 10 to 13 years old, or the middle school years) is an important window when positive experiences that support learning and connection can affect development. Going on the internet to create, contribute, or connect can be a positive experience for young people. Online experiences offer new spaces for adolescents to express their creativity, explore who they are and where they fit in, support causes they care about and connect with peers in ways that can enhance their relationships.

Co-viewing, creating, and participating in online spaces can open opportunities for positive joint experiences and allow parents to identify any risks or content that makes them uncomfortable.

Encouraging these kinds of positive experiences online does not require an entirely new set of parenting skills. Instead, parents can use strategies similar to those used when children walk out the door to go to school or hang out at the park with their friends. Parents cannot be everywhere or see everything. But they can find out who their children are with, what they are doing, and how they feel about it, which can reduce problems. This kind of monitoring and communication can also help youth as they navigate the online world.

Keeping youth safe on the internet

Parents should consider some critical issues to ensure their children are engaging with online content safely. During early adolescence, when youth are particularly sensitive to social feedback and belonging, increased exposure to bullying, pornography, unhealthy body images, and harmful targeted advertising can have amplified effects.

Parents should also be aware that some adolescents, for example, those with mental health problems and those who may already be struggling with body image issues, may be more susceptible to viewing negative content on the internet and having negative online experiences than their peers. Knowing your child is key.

Caregivers should also understand that technology use also leaves a digital trace that can follow young people into adulthood by creating a type of permanent record of images and comments that would otherwise be forgotten or excused due to age and immaturity.

Moreover, sleep is critical to physical health, mental health, and learning during adolescence, so families should limit late-night technology use that gets in the way of youth getting more than eight hours of uninterrupted sleep each night.

Photo: Andrea Piacquadio. Pexels.

How parents and caregivers can support and protect youth by making the internet a safer place

Parents and caregivers can make the internet a safer place by:

1. Monitoring and being aware
2. Going on the internet together when possible
3. Educating young people
4. Communicating with young people
5. Using helpful resources

1. Monitoring and being aware

Unlike physical places youth may go that are out of parents’ sight, digital technology provides opportunities to monitor where youth have been online, ideally with youths’ knowledge and consent. Parental controls – such as content filters, time limits, and applications that allow monitoring of online activities – can help.

2. Going on the internet together when possible

Viewing, creating, and participating in online spaces together can open opportunities for positive joint experiences and allow parents to identify risks or content that makes them uncomfortable.

3. Educating young people

Parents can explain the potential risks of digital technology use, discussing the importance of keeping personal information safe and of moderating screen time to make room for in-person activities. Developing a family media plan with your child can help start a conversation about the types of activities and platforms children are allowed to spend time on, and will allow young adolescents to have input into any rules that may govern their use.

4. Communicating with young people

Talking to your child about what they are seeing or experiencing on the internet should become part of daily conversations. When youth are exposed to age-inappropriate content or encounter problematic experiences like cyberbullying or social rejection, having an adult to talk to can make a difference. (Common Sense Media offers prompts to start talking, from conversations about activities to more specific concerns about emotional health and negative feelings.)

5. Using helpful resources

Parents and teachers can access a growing list of resources to help support children online, including:

• The One Mind PsyberGuide provides a teen-specific guide to online mental health applications.
• Common Sense Media resources support parents navigating traditional and new forms of media engagement.
• The American Academy of Pediatrics has a guide to creating a family media plan.
• Teens and Tech Center provides education and resources for parents, educators, and teenagers.

Designing technology to support young people

Even with parents’ best efforts, it is impossible to oversee children’s every online interaction. As parents, we have limited influence over how our children’s data are handled and stored, the types of targeted advertising they are exposed to, and the features intended to encourage them to stay on the internet for long periods of time.

Talking to your child about what they are seeing or experiencing online should become part of your daily conversations.

We expect that the physical spaces where our children spend time, like community parks, sports fields, and classrooms, help them grow and learn while keeping them safe. Digital spaces should be the same. Some lawmakers are working toward this.

For example, last year, California passed a bill that will require digital technology companies to protect young users’ privacy and personal data, limit dangerous content, and maintain default settings that prioritize safety. New York is considering similar legislation. While changes that would enhance safety are important, companies and policies must also consider regulations and design features that intentionally promote positive development in online spaces where youth congregate.

What do caregivers need to know about equitable access to digital technology?

Research is clear that children in families and schools with fewer resources receive less guidance tailored to learning as they begin to navigate the online world than do their peers in families and schools with more resources. Adolescents from minoritized and marginalized communities – such as youth of color and LGBTQ+ youth – are at the greatest risk for experiencing harassment and victimization online, even as they report positive experiences like finding “spaces of refuge” and community on the internet that may not be available to them in their physical environments.

Although discussion of technology tends to focus on limiting screen time, too many students are unable to access the basic benefits of technology, particularly for learning and education. Black and Hispanic students and those from families with lower incomes are more likely to have limited access to devices and the Internet than their peers.

Photo: Omar Ramadan. Pexels.

To help address these gaps, many school districts are working to provide free or reduced-cost WiFi to students. Families who need help to afford reliable Internet access and connected devices can contact their local school district or apply for the Affordable Connectivity Program.

In addition, digital technology companies and policymakers need to establish digital solutions and innovations that make the online world a place of opportunity rather than posing added risks for our most vulnerable youth.

Conclusion

Early adolescence brings new opportunities for building connections, education, and healthy learning and exploration. If we focus the conversation around “teens and tech” only on protection, we may miss opportunities to meet young people where they are and build online environments that match their needs.

Parents and caregivers have an important role in helping our children develop a healthy relationship with digital technologies. That includes talking directly with them about potential risks of online interactions and how to moderate digital technology use, providing oversight where possible to see what children are doing on the internet, and setting limits to ensure that technology does not interfere with sleep and other activities important to well-being. Most importantly, it means building strong relationships with our children so they tell us what is going on and when they are struggling.

But we cannot do this on our own. It is time for the owners, designers, and creators of the online spaces where young people spend their time to step up and build environments that support young people while also keeping them safe. We need to ask different types of questions so we learn not just how to protect but also how to support our children’s healthy development in an increasingly digital world.

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